Best (or worst) fantasy football punishments, ideas for finishing last place in 2024

Sloan Piva

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Best (or worst) fantasy football punishments, ideas for finishing last place in 2024 image

Two basic emotions exist in fantasy football: the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. It's not a hobby that warrants much grey area in between — you're either riding high or you're feeling low. And nobody knows the lows of losing better (or worse) than the manager of a last-place team in an uber-competitive league.

For many friend circles, fantasy football punishments have almost become a game within a game. The object is twofold: (1) try desperately to avoid finishing in last place, and (2) help torture and/or humiliate the sorry-sucker leaguemate who did finish there.

Once a niche custom, this practice has become a widely adopted tradition in 2024. And in many cases, the emotional incentive to avoid finishing last has become much more alluring than the financial incentive of finishing as league champion! 

DOMINATE YOUR DRAFT: 2024 Fantasy Football Cheat Sheet

If you have a queasy stomach, click the back button now. Do you sympathize with fantasy managers who don't set their lineups or replace injured players? Adios. This column is for the fantasy football diehards — the ones who compete all season long, and then punish the ones who didn't work hard enough to avoid a loser's fate.

Just joshing — it's all in fun, or as Omar from "The Wire" once said, "It's all in the game." The Sporting News has heard countless stories about fantasy football punishments over the years. Some are harmless and only slightly embarrassing, while others are extreme, excruciating, and/or totally humiliating. 

Let's go over some of the best — and worst — fantasy football punishments for 2024. Good luck, have fun, and stay out of the basement!

2024 PPR RANKINGS
Top 250 Overall | RB | WR | TE | DEF/ST | K

Best (or worst) last-place fantasy football punishments for losing your league in 2024

Tattoo/Piercing

This one is probably the most common viral punishment, as well as the most controversial. After all, as much as we like to believe we control the fates of our fantasy teams with skill and deft roster decisions, fantasy football is often a game of luck and misfortune.

Is a painful piercing or an embarrassing tattoo really deserved if you stumble into last place in a given season? If your answer is "yes," then ink away. If you're a normal human and the answer is "no," then read on.

@thesportingnews laundry service might be a little too harsh. #fantasy #ffl #nfl #greenscreen #PepsiApplePieChallenge @The Sporting News ♬ FEEL THE GROOVE - Queens Road, Fabian Graetz

Playing a U.S. Open Qualifier

One of our personal favorites comes from the Midwest after the 2021 season, where one man's fantasy squad suffered a tragic fate thanks to a rare below-average Patrick Mahomes year and a Week 8 injury to Derrick Henry.

The punishment for worst record in this guy's league: Play in a U.S. Open qualifier in Kansas City. This is a long play of a punishment — John Eckert went 35 over par in his first 13 holes and finished with a 112. Legend has it he's still haunted by his 10-foot tee shot on hole 10.

2024 POSITION TIERS & DRAFT STRATEGY
QB | RB | WR | TE  | D/ST 

Taking the SAT/ACTs

Picture a 40-year-old man walking into a high school classroom to take a four-hour standardized test alongside nervous teenagers, all because he forgot to set his fantasy football lineup a couple of times.

This punishment is more lighthearted and doesn't harm anyone, but damn if it isn't a waste of time and a complete embarrassment (especially if there's a stipulation that you actually have to "try" and not just sit there for the afternoon). Talk about feeling dumb on multiple levels.

Open Mic Comedy/Motivational Speaker

So, you think you're funny or inspiring? Prove it in front of a crowd of complete strangers who are expecting a real stand-up comedy show or motivational TED talk.

And you can't just run off stage when the heckling starts — you have to finish your "set" and never let on why you're really there. You can cry afterward, though.

Waffle House Marathon

If you don't know what Waffle House is, then you're missing out. This punishment requires spending 24 straight hours at a Waffle House restaurant, but each waffle you eat takes an hour off your time.

Could I probably scarf down 10 waffles within the 24-hour span? Of course. That still leaves 14 more hours to spend in an uncomfortable booth while feeling like a jackass.

2024 FANTASY AUCTION VALUES (PPR & STANDARD)
Overall | QB | RB | WR | TE | DEF/ST | K

Various Forms of Publicly Announcing Your Failure

This one is pretty simple, but still rather embarrassing. The last-place finisher has to stand near a busy intersection during rush hour holding some form of sign reading "I came in last in fantasy football. Honk to see me dance."

Another option: walking around outside a busy public area on a Friday night wearing a sandwich board detailing how bad you are at fantasy football (bonus points if you're only wearing the sandwich board).

Maybe there are people out there who would enjoy this kind of attention, but the average person would wear a red face for the duration of their punishment (and probably think long and hard about their fantasy decisions moving forward).

 

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How many #WaffleHouse waffles can you eat in 24 hours? Like for Part 3 of fantasy football punishments. #greenscreen #greenscreenvideo #nfl #fantasy

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Participate in NFL Combine Drills

If you're already embarrassed about being bad at fantasy football, why not take it a step further and show just how bad you are at real football? The average Joe is going to look absolutely ridiculous trying his best in the 40-yard dash, cone drills, vertical jump, and bench press.

Meanwhile, all the eyes (and cameras) of the other league members are there to soak in the hilarious occasion. This is pretty harmless, too (aside from the damage to your ego...and likely hamstring pull), but at least you'd get some exercise.

2024 FANTASY SLEEPERS
QB | RB | WR | TE 

Tomato/Paint Ball/SuperSoaker Barrage

These are pretty self-explanatory. The rest of the league pelts the loser with tomatoes, paint balls, or high-powered squirt guns. Such practices may not seem very creative, but not everything needs to be an art project.

Bruises take a while to heal, and the emotional toll of losing and then being assaulted by your friends because of losing will take even longer. It all serves to extend the length of time you have to remember how bad your season was.

Photoshoot for a Calendar

This involves your buddies picking outfits for each month and you doing a photoshoot for a calendar. Cupid costume for February? Bunny costume for April? Stars-and-stripes speedo for July? Yeah, this one could be bad. Another reason to not be a turkey and forget to set your lineup this fall.

2024 Standard, Non-PPR Rankings
Top 250 Overall | QB | RB | WR | TE | D/ST | K

Beer Mile

A lot of people love beer, but what about being full of beer while running a mile? This punishment forces the loser to drink a full beer, run a quarter mile, drink another beer, run another quarter mile, and so on until they've run a full 5,280 feet. At least you can maybe start to get a buzz while you do this one (and probably heartburn). 

Bedroom Poster

Another simple yet effective punishment. The loser of the league has to buy a large poster of the player they selected in the first round and keep it in their bedroom for the whole year. Harmless, but a constant reminder of failure...and a surefire way to annoy your significant other.

Picking Up the Tab

The loser simply has to buy food and drinks for the next league gathering, be it the end-of-season party or next year's draft. This one is pretty simple — but if you're cheap, you might consider it the worst one yet.

Santa's Lap

The last-place loser has to sit on Santa's lap at the mall (or loudly complain when security tells them that they're not allowed). If you want to make them wear an elf costume, all the better. Make sure someone films the inevitable arrest, too.

Rival's Jersey

This is for the more tame punishers. In this scenario, the loser has to wear a rival NFL team's jersey to the next fantasy draft (and, of course, post photos of it on social media). For those who aren't die-hard NFL fans, this might sound easy, but it's a tough pill to swallow. Picture a Cowboys fan wearing a Jalen Hurts jersey, a Bengals fan wearing a Najee Harris jersey, or a Vikings fan wearing a Christan Watson jersey. It just feels dirty. 

Lemonade Stand

The last place owner has to operate a fully functional lemonade stand in a busy part of town for a full day (with the profits being split among the other members of the league). Most important — the lemonade has to be good, so no cheap Crystal Light crap.

 

@thesportingnews

It’s the banana phone case for me. #fantasyfootball #nfl #fail #loser #greenscreen #greenscreenvideo #challange

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Laundry Service

The loser must do a full load of laundry for every member of the league. It's embarrassing, time-consuming, and potentially gross. You just know someone is putting soiled underpants in there.

Car Wash

Everyone in the league gets a shiny new car wash courtesy of the last-place loser (bikini optional).

Ride to Nowhere

In this excruciating punishment, the loser must take a day-long, non-stop train, bus, or plane ride to and from the destination of choice of the other people in the league.

And don't think you get to be on your phone or tablet the whole time. You can take your phone for emergencies only — but otherwise, you just get a disposable camera that you have to use like a true tourist.

@thesportingnews

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Child's Seat

The loser must sit in a child-sized plastic chair for the duration of the next fantasy draft. Not only will they be sitting lower than everyone else (fitting), but they will also be uncomfortable and look like a complete idiot (also fitting).

Freezing Plunge

There's the standard option (just make someone get in a freezing body of water) or the deluxe package (dress as a pirate — and talk like a pirate — while "walking the plank" into a chilly river or lake). A symbolic and cold-hearted custom, to be sure. Set your lineups next time, Iceman!

Mystery Bag/Roulette Wheel

The loser draws from a bag or spins a wheel full of random punishments submitted by other league members at the beginning of the season. Keep in mind, you could get your own punishment, so you might want to take it easy just in case.

License Plate

You have to get a vanity license plate announcing your fantasy failure ("FFLOSER?" "12OF12?" "FF AHOLE?") and keep it on your car for a full year. You could also just go with any embarrassing vanity plate, even if it's not fantasy football-related. That gives you more options.

Keychain/Wallet/Phone Case

This one requires the honor system, but it basically involves you being forced to use a wallet or phone case of your league's choosing until the start of next season. (Suggestions: a pink Velcro Hello Kitty wallet or a Fabio phone case. You all remember Fabio, right?)

Imagine the looks when you pull those out in public. You could also force the loser to have an embarrassing charm of some kind on their keychain. It's the same principle, but it's easier to forget it's there...until you notice a stranger trying to sneak a cellphone pic so they can more widely make fun of you.

It's all part of the process to motivate managers to stay engaged during the season — and ensure the entertainment of the rest of the league long after the league championship.

Jackson Sparks and Matt Lutovsky contributed to this story

Sloan Piva

Sloan Piva Photo

Sloan Piva is a content producer for The Sporting News, primarily focused on betting, fantasy sports, and poker. A lifelong New Englander, Sloan earned his BA and MA in Journalism from the University of Massachusetts and now lives in coastal Rhode Island with his wife and two kids.