Because irony no longer exists and Capitals-Penguins isn't quite as dumb as it could be, here is something Tom Wilson said on Tuesday.
Tom Wilson: "I'd love to be able to go out there and drop the gloves and grab Letang, but it's a new age."
— Dan Steinberg (@dcsportsbog) May 3, 2016
Congrats to him for managing to drop the series' funniest line yet, narrowly edging out Penguins coach Mike Sullivan referring to Penguins defenseman Kris Letang's hit on Marcus Johansson as "a body check." What Letang did was a lot of things, but "body check" wasn't one of them.
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(UPDATE: Letang has been suspended for one game. The league ruled that the hit was late with head contact, but not charging.)
The series, which Pittsburgh leads 2-1, is very entertaining and very stupid, primarily because it's Example A of the utter tarpit NHL the disciplinary system, and player/coach responses to it, becomes at this time of the year.
Almost literally nobody is telling the truth. Every set of opinions on every situation is determined squarely by how it affects the team of whoever is articulating it. Everyone has a different idea of how to respond to everything. Nothing is real. "The Code" isn't dead because it never lived in the first place. It's great!
And the reason it's so great to hear from Wilson in particular is ... he started all of this in Game 1, when he delivered an attempted knee-on-knee hit that failed to incapacitate Conor Sheary only because he's six inches shorter than Wilson.
"It's a new age" means almost nothing at all; 20 years ago, nobody would've thought twice about Letang's hit. He wouldn't have fought anyone. He wouldn't have a hearing scheduled for 1 p.m. on Tuesday. Wilson sounds like a high school kid leaving wistful comments on Pink Floyd YouTube videos, since "all new music sucks."
If he hit on something, it was probably by accident; in our current age, the only passable response to a dirty play seems to be another dirty play. WIlson's on Sheary begat Brooks Orpik's on Olli Maatta begat Letang's on Johansson, and several other near-misses on both sides throughout Game 3. Maybe, since Wilson can't "drop the gloves and grab" anyone, making a run at them is all he has left.
It's not even Wilson's fault; he's playing in a league that struggles to accurately report injuries its best day with a disciplinary system that hinges on how injured a player may be.
Really, what else was he going to say? It didn't make sense, but if he's confused, he's not alone.