It's been over two weeks without hockey and morale is low. The coronavirus pandemic keeps getting worse and we're yet to see even a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. At this rate, who knows how long it'll be before the NHL returns.
But we must stay strong in these dark times. We must not let our heads drop. We must be the positive force we want to see in the world.
If nothing else, the pause in the current season has given us a great opportunity to take a look back at some of the best moments throughout the NHL's long and storied history. While we're positive none of these haircuts fall under that label, they're still glorious rays of hope that we can all take inspiration from.
MORE: Tracking how the coronavirus has affected the hockey world
Without any further ado, here are the most incredible cuts in NHL history:
Mike Commodore
Getting us underway is the stunning red afro of journeyman defenseman Mike Commodore, which arguably reached its peak in 2006 when he won the Stanley Cup with the Carolina Hurricanes.
This is just simply not a hairstyle you see every day. Rarely do you find a person with hair of such a deep red hue that can grow it in an afro. He didn't just pull it off, he made it look (relatively) good.
Michal Handzus
Handzus spent most of his career looking like a relatively normal person, but about five percent of it was spent with the type of mullet that can only be described as unthinkable. It was during his time with the Blackhawks that the Slovakian forward really cut loose.
On this day in 2006, the Blackhawks acquired Michal Handzus from the Flyers in exchange for Kyle Calder. Eight games into the season, Handzus tore his ACL and missed the rest of the campaign #Hockey365 #Blackhawks pic.twitter.com/PR11d98RSt
— Mike Commito (@mikecommito) August 4, 2019
Jaromir Jagr
Just three entries into this list and we've already seen the good, the bad and the ugly. Jagr's rise to fame in the NHL came during a period in the early 90s where you could seemingly get away with anything on the hairdo front, and yet this is still truly unforgivable.
If Jaromir Jagr has played his last NHL game, all I can say is: hair's to you, kid. pic.twitter.com/bUtsazAbzQ
— Adam Proteau (@Proteautype) January 28, 2018
There are simply no excuses for that. Interestingly, Jagr's mullet went through something of a metamorphosis throughout his 24 years in the NHL. Here it is again several decades later.
That's a little better, I guess? Hard to get much worse.
Scott Hartnell
Scott Hartnell occupied the strange realm between John C. Reilly and Jaromir Jagr. It seemed like whenever he switched teams he'd alternate between being clean-cut and looking like a shipwreck survivor.
He actually cut most of his hair off in 2010 and donated it to the Locks of Love charity. You stay classy, Scotty.
Barry Melrose
The ESPN hockey analyst has rocked a quintessential mullet since his coaching days. Business in the front, party in the back, and plenty of product to keep things slick.
He's also done an E:60 special on the wild and wonderful haircuts of the Minnesota State Boys Hockey Tournament.
Ron Duguay
Believe it or not, the image below is of a man who was an NHL player at the time.
In an era where old-time hockey reigned supreme, Ron Duguay broke the mold with a perm straight out of Grease. And not one of the male characters, either.
Brent Burns
The San Jose Sharks defenceman has become iconic for his wild appearance, featuring a gaptoothed grin, a bushy beard, and a man-bun to top it all off.
At one point in his life, Burns must have looked like a normal human being, right?
@NHLhistorygirl He appears to be going for the Young Brent Burns pic.twitter.com/PgBP1jWLUS
— RM Cooper (@RFCapsMoustache) March 29, 2016
Ah... alright then.
Patrick Kane
While not normally known for his extraordinary head of hair, Blackhawks star Patrick Kane turned heads with this fascinating look a few years back.
Find out how Patrick Kane's hair is affecting the #StanleyCupFinal in 10 mins: http://t.co/IByVwW6swP pic.twitter.com/cItGl1vxYX
— INDIE88 (@Indie88Toronto) June 4, 2015
Business in the front, party in the back, racing stripes on the side?
Al Iafrate
And there it is, ladies and gentlemen. We have officially bottomed out.
This @NewYorker article on Minnesota's legendary hockey mullets is awesome. I just take issue with the idea the "main ingredient in hockey hair is volume." See: Al Iafrate. A true hero. https://t.co/0cqx13ZNRk pic.twitter.com/p1WW4vr9bU
— Jeff Stone (@jeffstone500) April 5, 2019
Iafrate went for the mullet look a few years after his proverbial window had closed, resulting in a hair island forming on top of his head. Did he not notice? Did he simply not care? Either way, you have to respect the guy for being willing to rock such an unprecedented look.
Wayne Gretzky
The great one had more than his fair share of great hairstyles through the years, the best of which comes courtesy of this bleach-blonde mullet.
3. Wayne Gretzky. The Great One also bore some great hair. On a scale from 1-100, this mullet is a 99 pic.twitter.com/jy4Fae7ypj
— Brendon Hult (@brendonhult) June 7, 2016
You can just imagine the pure thrill Wayne Gretzky fan club members got when they opened that up.