With the clock ticking and a decision needing to be made on his professional future, John Tavares admitted "my heart was in two places."
Remain on Long Island with the Islanders — "a place where I'd been for a long time and helped me become the man I am today," he said — or return home to Toronto to play for the team he grew up rooting for as a child, the Maple Leafs.
And, though, ultimately Tavares is coming home for the next seven years after signing a $77 million contract Sunday with the Maple Leafs, he called it "a bittersweet day" because of what he decided to leave behind.
"My gut was just tearing apart, my heart was tearing apart, trying to figure out what I wanted to do," Tavares said at his introductory press conference Sunday in Toronto.
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Tavares explained that upon returning home with his fiancee after hearing pitches from six teams at his agent's office in Los Angeles, he knew in his heart that he would choose to sign with either the Islanders or Maple Leafs. On Saturday, he paced at his home, circling his pool leaning more and more toward becoming a Maple Leaf, while knowing that decision would break the hearts of a fan base he truly loves and respects back in New York.
"Yesterday was a heck of a day," said Tavares, the Isles' top overall selection in the 2009 NHL Entry Draft who totaled 621 points in 669 career games.
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In the end, the chance to play for a young, talented team that he believes will contend for the Stanley Cup throughout the duration of his contract, is coached by a man he knows and respects in Mike Babcock, and was his favorite as a child growing up in nearby Mississauga, Ontario, trumped his sentimental side of being a career-long Islander.
"I knew it would be a little bit of the uncomfortable thing to do," he said, "but I didn't want that to hold me back from taking the chance on a great opportunity."
Sportsnet's John Shannon reported that Tavares informed the Islanders and new team president and general manager Lou Lamoriello of his decision Saturday night and spoke with several of his former teammates on Sunday. He also penned a touching and honest letter to the Islanders fan base on Twitter.
— John Tavares (@91Tavares) July 1, 2018
Tavares departs the Islanders as the fifth-leading scorer in franchise history and, perhaps more importantly, as a man who was not only its captain on the ice, but a classy representative off of it, despite numerous tumultuous times for the organization.
"That place means a lot to me," Tavares said. "Everything I've been through there, the impact people had on me...it was such a hard decision just because of how special it was (on Long Island).
"It really is a bittersweet day."