Kentucky, as you probably know, lost at home to Evansville in one of the biggest college upsets in
If you weren’t watching the game, or didn’t happen to be keeping tabs on the score, but just happened to scroll past a certain picture of Wildcats coach John Calipari on Twitter, you probably knew something awful had happened on the court to the top-ranked Wildcats.
Because, folks, no coach in college hoops does the “agony face” quite like John Calipari.
You know what I’m talking about. It’s that look that combines elements of “I can’t believe that just happened” with “I’m completely heartbroken for my players” with just a dash of “My life will never be OK again” sprinkled in, just for good measure.
And for Calipari, it’s really and truly a work of art.
MORE: Evansville's upset of No. 1 Kentucky sends clear message to top programs
Not every coach has an “agony face” in their expression arsenal for when things aren’t going well. For some, like Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski, there is only simmering, intense rage. For some, like Virginia’s Tony Bennett, there is only stoicism — good luck trying to guess the score by his facial expression. For some, like Kansas’s Bill Self, the look is mostly surprised disgust. And for some, like Iowa’s Fran McCaffery, there is fuming rage that borders insanity (and far too often, rage that steps over the border).
But we’re not talking about those expressions today. Today, we’re looking at 10 of the best agony faces in college hoops. There’s no official ranking — apparently the Fagan Agony-Face Misery Index formula wasn’t approved by Sporting News editors — but just 10 coaches who aren’t afraid to let their disappointment show on the sidelines.
John Calipari, Kentucky
Why he’s here: There’s a reason Getty Images has thousands and thousands of pictures of Calipari in its library, and it’s not just because he’s the coach at Kentucky. Calipari makes no attempts to hide his emotion of the moment, good or bad.
He's the best. Here are the others ...
Tom Izzo, Michigan State
Why he’s here: Izzo does rage well — his you-must-die stare is among the best — and he does elation well, too, making him a five-star coach emoter on the sidelines.
Roy Williams, North Carolina
Why he’s here: It was a little difficult to find an agony picture of Ol’ Roy that would fit in our extreme-vertical three-picture splits, because so very often the agony is accompanied by Williams bending over and grabbing his knees because he can’t believe what just happened.
Mike Brey, Notre Dame
Why he’s here: Brey’s a favorite to watch, and not just because he’s part of the anti-tie crew. As much as any coach out there, you really feel like he wants to be out there on the court with his players, and those emotions show on his face, win or lose.
Frank Martin, South Carolina
Why he’s here: Yes, Martin is known for his anger and death-stare on the sidelines, but his “agony face” is highly underrated (everywhere but here!). Despite what it might seem just watching Martin stalk the sidelines on TV, he is, first and foremost, a players coach. And as a players coach, he feels the disappointment of a stunning, painful loss as much as his players.
Bruce Weber, Kansas State
Why he’s here: Like most coaches, Weber has never seen a call against his team that he’s agreed with. So there’s a difference between Exasperated Weber and Agony Weber, even if that difference is hard to discern sometimes. But Agony Weber has more pain in his eyes than Exasperated Weber, and K-State, Illinois and know the difference well.
Bob Huggins, West Virginia
Why he’s here: The things we said for Martin fit Huggins well, too.
Jim Boeheim, Syracuse
Why he’s here: No coach in college hoops can say more with folded arms than Boeheim. Mostly, he’s just disappointed you’re not being better at the thing you’re supposed to do — that goes for referees, players and fans — but sometimes, there’s genuine pain that things aren’t going well for the players he cares for.
Bruce Pearl, Auburn
Why he’s here: Auburn fans don’t really need a scoreboard, they just need to look at their coach’s face to know how the game’s progressing. Safe to say, there wasn’t much of the “agony face” during Auburn’s run to the Final Four last spring.
Kelvin Sampson, Houston
Why he’s here: The picture speaks for itself, doesn't it?
