The NFL's trade deadline has moved back to Halloween this season, but that doesn't mean many more players will be changing costumes — er, uniforms — by Tuesday at 4 p.m. ET. The players easiest to move tend to be unhappy underachievers who draw limited value in return — see Adrian Peterson and now, maybe, Martavis Bryant.
While MLB, the NBA and the NHL actually see blockbuster deals every midseason between buyers and sellers, the nature of the NFL (much shorter seasons, much different systems, more salary cap issues) make it difficult to pull off successful marquee swaps.
But imagine putting on the masks of all 32 NFL general managers at once. Knowing each team's strengths, weaknesses and true place in the standings, being able to move anybody anywhere with even the slightest sense of reason ... What would you do?
This is what we would do.
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Chargers QB Philip Rivers for Jaguars 2018 first-round draft pick
The fun mock trade that just about everybody has done is sending Eli Manning from the Giants to the Jaguars because of the convenient Tom Coughlin factor in Jacksonville. But wouldn't the Jaguars want a veteran upgrade from Blake Bortles and not the same type of passer at this point? Sorry, Eli.
Los Angeles (3-4) probably thinks it suddenly is back in AFC playoff contention with three straight victories. That's a shame, because the Chargers should be selling. They will be squashed with a brutal second-half schedule, starting with New England in Week 7. Guess where the Chargers play after a bye in Week 8: at Jacksonville. Now that's convenient.
Rivers has a no-trade clause, but if the 35-year-old becomes convinced that the Jaguars are much closer to competing for a championship than the Chargers are, he should consider waiving it. Besides, he can easily afford a tricked-up express jet to allow him to commute coast-to-coast in less time than it takes to navigate LA traffic.
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Bortles has played better of late, and he is embracing his role as a game manager as the Jaguars lean on the power running game and their dominant defense. But Rivers would provide a veteran gunslinger who can make big plays to help put away Jaguars opponents.
Chargers coach Anthony Lynn will be very interested in Louisville's Lamar Jackson as the team's next franchise QB. Getting a second first-rounder in 2018 would easily allow them to draft him. The Jaguars are one of the few teams that can handle taking on Rivers' contract, and he could give them several more good seasons.
Coughlin and the Giants didn't keep Rivers as the No. 1 pick in 2004. It's too bad Coughlin won't get this ideal opportunity to see what Rivers can do for the Jaguars.
49ers RB Carlos Hyde for Redskins WR Terrelle Pryor
These guys crossed paths as teammates in the Ohio State offense in 2010. Seven years later, they should be traded for each other to significantly boost San Francisco's downfield passing game and Washington's power running game.
49ers coach Kyle Shanahan has been fickle about Hyde's usage and whether he's a good fit in the rushing attack. At the same time, Shanahan and the team's free-agency courting of Pryor indicates he's still a good fit for another part of the offense.
The 49ers can keep the youth movement going and turn to rookie running back Matt Breida along with rookie quarterback C.J. Beathard and rookie tight end George Kittle. The Redskins already have moved on from the disappointing Pryor after signing him to a one-year deal, benching him in favor of first-rounder Josh Doctson in Week 7.
The Redskins want to pound the ball between the tackles to complement Kirk Cousins' big arm, but coach Jay Gruden has to be fed up with oft-injured Rob Kelley and mistake-filled rookie Samaje Perine providing scarce production in that area. A Buckeye-for-Buckeye deal involving a rebuilding team and a wild-card contender? Boom.
Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes for Browns CB Jason McCourty and QB DeShone Kizer
Alex Smith is looking like he has a few seasons of top play left for Kansas City. Mahomes is looking at a longer-than-expected wait to be a starter. Meanwhile, the Chiefs are in "win Super Bowl now" mode and don't have all the defensive parts — especially with safety Eric Berry lost for the season — to get the job done.
Sending Mahomes to Carson Palmer-less Arizona to get Larry Fitzgerald and put the offense over the top would be great, but there's no chance of that because of Fitzgerald's no-trade clause and the Chiefs' limited cap space. So the Chiefs should consider moving unknown offense later for defensive help now, instead.
Going into Week 7, before he had to miss the game against his former team, the Titans, with an ankle injury, McCourty was Pro Football Focus' highest-graded overall corner this season. Given he's 30, it would merely be a short-term move for the Chiefs, but one that would also net another developmental QB project in return. Marcus Peters and McCourty would give the Chiefs one of the league's best cornerback duos and erase a big weakness.
As much as Andy Reid and the Chiefs' coaching staff have raved about Mahomes and his arm, Kizer's skill set is better suited for a Smith successor. Mahomes needs to be on the field somewhere soon, and the Browns might as well take a chance on a fourth QB. It's clear they have already lost patience with Kizer.
Patriots CB Malcolm Butler for Cowboys DE/DT David Irving
New England went back and forth on the idea of trading Butler during the offseason. Now New Orleans, which reportedly was involved in those trade talks, is happy with corners Marshawn Lattimore and Ken Crawley, and the Patriots are seeing more of why they didn't want to give Butler a lucrative long-term contract.
Butler had a well-timed showcase against the Falcons in Week 7 with Stephon Gilmore and Eric Rowe not healthy enough to play. Meanwhile, Irving has come back red-hot from his suspension, recording three sacks in his first two games of the season.
The Cowboys need a top corner, and the Patriots need a versatile piece to get after the quarterback. If the Patriots plan to move on from the 27-year-old Super Bowl hero, they should do it now with a calculated gamble on a 24-year-old with an off-field history. Both players can help contenders immediately in different ways.
Raiders WR Amari Cooper for Giants DE Jason Pierre-Paul
Oakland got a monster game from Cooper in Week 7 after six (mostly) bad games. It was more because of the favorable matchup against the Chiefs' non-Peters defensive backs than Cooper suddenly emerging as a dominant wideout. After a slow start for the Giants, JPP got his groove back as a freakish edge rusher with his dominant game at Denver in Week 6.
With "AC/DC" dominating a game, the Raiders might find it harder to break up the connection between Cooper and quarterback Derek Carr. But then again, Cooper's value on the open market won't get higher given their schedule, which sets him up for more struggles. At the same time, Oakland's pass defense remains in shambles despite the edge presence of Khalil Mack. Pierre-Paul playing off the All-Pro in the Raiders' hybrid scheme would make both players more dangerous.
Cooper would give the Giants a much-needed top wideout with Odell Beckham Jr. injured, and it would give them some leverage later with Beckham in deciding how much they want to pay the talented-but-mercurial wideout with some durability concerns. Cooper also would stay in the same Packers-tinged passing offense going to Manning and Ben McAdoo. Best case, Cooper and Beckham team up as a dynamic duo for a long time.
Because Cooper is only 23 and has little injury baggage vs. the 28-year-old JPP, it would be a little more sane to include Raiders end Mario Edwards Jr. for Giants wideout Sterling Shepard as the necessary undercard in the deal. But helping a bad passing defense and a bad passing offense would be a win-win.
